Rome - page 6
May
22nd
Relics and Catacombs
After breakfast I set out down Via Cavour to find the second moped rental mentioned in my book. Halfway there I found a different moped rental. Four Americans my age on their way out highly recommended it and the guy working there did all my paperwork. He got my helmet and we found my bike when the proprietor showed up and asked if I had ridden a moped before. Well, no, but how hard can it be? I’ve seen old men and middle aged women driving them. “Hand me your helmet,” he instructs. As soon as he has it in his hands he declares “Ciao!” and storms back inside with a flourish. Shouting, cajoling and affectations of indignant disbelief follow. The old man swears Rome is too dangerous, the young man swears I told him I’d driven before and I get handed back my paperwork.
So, of course, the episode concludes with me wanting a moped more than ever. But before I try again I’m going to have to learn how they work so I can claim to have ridden one convincingly. In the interim, I change my plans for the day and head south to San Pietro in Vincoli (Saint Peter in Chains). This church is most famous for Michelangelo’s statues of Moses.
Moses is bottom middle
The bottom three statues were supposed to go in the Vatican but the pope died and the new pope wasn’t interested so they ended up in this church. The book describes this statue as “marvelously energetic”. I don’t see it. Moses looks a little too big for his chair. He’s kind of clutching at himself. His hair is a mess. He’s obviously been working out during his 40 years wandering the desert. Maybe Michelangelo’s reputation has been a little exaggerated over the years?
So they’ve got a relic here: The chains that bound St. Peter in Jerusalem (apparently this wasn’t the first time the good saint had been chained). As would sink in a little later, Saint Peter is a big deal here in Rome, so this is kind of cool for the Romans.
The chains, displayed proper relic style
I thought this was pretty cool too:
I’m not sure how Death fits into Catholic mythology but he certainly turns up quite a bit inside Catholic churches. I’ve got a feeling he’s more pagan than anything but I guess even the popes agreed that he looks too awesome to deny.
Next I went to San Clemente which is not outwardly an impressive church but they’ve excavated the older church it sits on top of and a temple to Minerva below that. And really, it’s not a trip to Rome without a catacomb, so I paid the 5 Euros to get underground. Once again, they didn’t want anyone taking pictures but there were French and German tourists taking pictures all over the place so I don’t feel too bad about my two surreptitious photos.
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As you can see, there was actually a lot of space down there. There was also a running water supply, which was cool as you could hear it before you located the source. There were some mosaics but I imagined these were the primary cause of the no-photo policy so I restrained myself. It appears that this church has its own website.
Favorite Christian pastime - being eaten by lions
It was hotter than hell today. You know it’s hot when the old people start climbing into the fountains. This was the third senior citizen to mount the fountain in the church’s courtyard while I was sitting there:
I left San Clemente and found my own private fountain at a dead end leading to a secret government compound (there seem to be secret government compounds all over the place in Rome). I have something of an infatuation with blood oranges and I felt compelled to photograph the orange I was eating by placing it in (or nearly in) the perspective point of my view from the dead-end.
Why can't you get a blood orange in California?
I found the Quattro Coronati abbey but it was closed and I was miserably hot. I sat in the shadowy entrance for a little while trying to figure out how I could absorb the experience of this really cool building without actually waiting for it to open. Actually I think I was just loath to leave the shade. (I just realized loathe and loath are spelled and pronounced differently).
I finally spotted a couple of the infamous Roman cats. These two were passed out under a park bench on the grounds of a hospital. I would later see troupes of cats wandering around in a few archeological sites but for some reason I hadn’t noticed any up until this point. You can buy calendars and postcards with these calicos sitting on statues, etc.
A second after I took this picture I scared the shit out of this cat (not intentionally! – who do you think I am?)
After some semi-delirious wandering through the heat I found myself at San Giovanni in Laterano. Jesus Christ! This church is big! This is Rome’s cathedral. What about Saint Peter’s? Well, you see, Saint Peter’s Basilica is actually in the Vatican City…so, no – I don’t buy it. It’s just an excuse to make another impossibly grand-scaled church. Apparently they call this the ‘ecumenical mother church’ which is funny because the doorman at the hotel kept calling me an ‘ecumenical mother’ (no, not really).
There
are 12 giant statues of the apostles
I noticed that the 12 apostles each got a statue and they were all labeled as ‘St.’ but I thought that Judas was an apostle and I can’t imagine him being a saint. Unfortunately, everyone is labeled in Latin and the more I’ve looked into it, the more confused I’ve become. Basically everyone back then had at least three different names (at least one of which was either John, Simon or Judas) and nobody today is 100% sure who anyone actually was.
It was in this church that I figured out the whole crossed keys thing. Everywhere I went I kept seeing two keys crossed. It turns out this is St. Peter’s icon. Because St. Peter was the first Pope, this is also the icon for the papacy and, in a way, for Roman Catholicism in general.
St. Peter has the power to shoot fire from his fingertips and can unlock any door with his keys of opening
Apparently they have both Peter and Paul’s skulls here hidden away somewhere above the altar. Would it be too much to ask to get those behind some plexi-glass where I could see them? I guess so. On the front porch there’s an ancient statue of Constantine (the Great, bitches!).
Looking disheveled and sunburned, I attempt to channel Constantine by draping my backpack over my arm and lifting up my camera above my head.
There is what appears to be an
entirely gold ancient-temple-styled alter in here (impressive for the sheer
amount of gold).
I realized I had wandered in through the back door and
got a good look at the proper entrance.
San Giovanni in Laterano
The piazza just behind San Giovanni contains the largest and oldest Egyptian obelisk in Rome. This thing is from the 15th Century BC, making it over 3000 years old! And wouldn’t you know it, the fucking thing was completely covered in tarps!
The most amazing erected tarp contraption in Rome
Granted, there are thousands of ancient relics in Rome and I should expect that at least some of them would be under repair at any given time, but come on, first the main fountain in Piazza Navona, then the Victor Emanuel Monument and now this.
My next stop was, surprise, surprise, another church, Santa Croce in Gerusalemme
The translation of this is ‘Holy Cross in Jerusalem’, making it my first church not named after a saint. Instead, this church, along with basically everything else in the neighborhood, is named after the awesome relics contained inside. Oh boy.
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When I stepped inside, I
discovered a rather dark and completely abandoned nave. Despite the very clean
Baroque exterior, the interior of the church was not very flashy and showed its
age. I drifted through slowly and couldn’t help but feel that this church was
the most ‘holy’ feeling of those I had been in so far. Maybe it was because I
was completely alone, or maybe it was the CD of chanting of Monks being piped
through the church sound system. There are a number of corridors branching off
of the nave and I had difficulty locating the relic room (I almost gave up!)
but eventually I turned a corner and found two middle aged Spanish women
pressed up in front of a glass display with their cameras running. One of them
eventually backed off and let me get a view. The other one started talking to
me and it soon became clear that she was in the throes of religious ecstasy.
It was nice sharing the moment with someone who was so enthusiastic but for a
little while I was worried that she was going to faint or be overcome with a
vision or something.
Ok, so let’s get down to the relics. Constantine’s mother, St. Helen went over to the holy land after the family converted to Christianity and tracked down everything of religious consequence that had survived the 300 years since Christ’s death. Now, we all know the possibility exists that that some sort of scam was pulled but we also know that Christ had plenty of followers who would have collected and horded his relics the moment his executors turned their backs. So I think it is quite possible that these things are authentic. There were security cameras in the room. I had to wonder if there were armed guards within dashing distance.
Fragments of the True Cross
The history of the True Cross is a fascinating story. Regardless of whether the cross located by st. Helen was actually the cross Christ was crucified on, it became the most prized relic in Christianity (i.e. the Western World). The cross was gradually fragmented and the pieces were often captured or re-captured in war. The fragments here are apparently one of only 10 relics that can be authentically traced to the original True Cross.
One third of the Titulus Crucis
The Titulus Crucis was a forgotten relic. This piece was discovered hidden behind a wall in the church during renovations in 1492. Accounts were later found corroborating it’s existence as a relic discovered at the same time as the cross. It was the placard placed on the cross that declared: “Jesus of Nazareth, The King of the Jews” which was a sarcastic title given by the Roman executors. I believe this is the only existing fragment of the Titulus Crucis and it is probably the most valuable relic in the room.
There is a big plank of wood mounted alongside the other relics which is apparently part of one of the other two crosses. Christ was crucified with two thieves and the three crosses were stored together. When Helen discovered the three crosses she performed a ‘miracle’ to determine which was the one Christ was crucified on. By “miracle” I’m going to infer, “guess” which means, to me, that this big plank of wood could very easily be the actual cross. Of course, it wasn’t revered for the last fifteen hundred years and really, at this point isn’t that more important?
St. Thomas’ finger bone and two thorns from the crown
On the top shelf were three displays. The middle one was a bunch of crap you can’t make out (therefore I’ve cropped it out). On the left we have a finger bone and it looks like it’s been stuck to a statue of a finger. We’d like to believe this is the finger that Thomas poked Christ with when he rose from the grave but that would require at least three big leaps of faith. On the right we have two thorns from the crown placed on Christ’s head; from what I’ve read there is no way of proving or disproving their authenticity. They are thorns and they are old.
Moving on, I wasn’t far from the city wall and a still-standing section of the aqueduct.
The Roman aqueduct
I imagine the top part extended the whole length.
After returning to the Hotel and resting, I walked all the way down to the end of Via Cavour and located the other scooter rental shop. That night I confirmed my observations, gleaned from watching people driving mopeds all day, with the hotel clerk: twist for gas, break like a bike, no gear shifting.