Feminine Sangfroid

An investigation of Grace

Although I have long been aware of my proclivity for observing nerds, dorks and geeks I have recently realized I have another observational favorite. Perhaps this second subject is too obvious, yet I think there is more to it than the ostensible; I will investigate.

I have a fascination with what has been called ‘grace’ - a certain sangfroid in females. Grace appears to be a combination of a calm demeanor, an even, attractive face and humble understanding eyes. I do not think that it is the same thing as class. Class implies wealth, position and the barrier of formality. This ‘grace’ is rare in the destitute, as it is uncommon in the rich – all indications are that it is something of a middle class trait.

Riding the commuter train in San Francisco affords me the opportunity to observe many of these women on a regular basis. They range in age from younger than myself to somewhere beyond 50, peaking in interest at around 30. The sheer scope of age leads me to believe that I am not simply attracted to these women, yet my affection is neither filial nor fraternal. Unlike my nerds, I do not feel that my role is simply the observer – the graceful woman has a clear awareness of her surroundings and, as part of her qualification of grace, liminally exudes indication of her awareness of my presence. I think that, in some strange way, my affection most resembles the paternal variety – that I view their presence, protectively, as something of a sophisticated luxury (like fine art), or that their collective compassion is a latent solace to be called upon should I encounter peril of the emotionally taxing variety.

If, in the realm of anthropology, nerds are situational comedy, the graceful woman is artistic integrity.

Continuing the metaphor, I suppose jerks are drama and youth is romance.

I might also point out that the graceful woman invariably has a very large diamond on the third finger of her left hand, indicating that I’m not the only person to make such observations.

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